What I Ate: November 21, 2010 (Pao's Mandarin House)

Lunch: After church, we took my parents to eat at Pao's Mandarin House (2300 Lohmans Spur # 134, Lakeway, TX (512) 263-8869) in Lakeway.

First we were "greeted" by a waiter who clearly did not want to be there. What actually happened was that the waiter was doing something at the front counter with his back to us (not turning after hearing the door bell ring as we entered). Then he finished what he was doing and glanced at us briefly as he turned to walk back to the table he was handling. We then waited for him to do whatever it was he was doing (it would have been nice for him to say, "wait" or something to acknowledge we existed) before he came back and asked us brusquely in Chinese "How many?" then plopped us at a small four top (we had four in our party) which wouldn't be enough space for Chinese people to eat family style (it would be enough if everyone ordered one of those Americanized Chinese lunch combination plates, but not large enough to share food. There were only 3 placesettings (flatware placed directly on the oil streaked table surface) so he came back and practically slammed the extra fork and spoon on the table. My thought was - oh, our waiter was trained at Din Ho BBQ… anyway, we asked to be moved to a larger table and the waiter said he didn't want to earlier since there was a large party in the other room where the bigger tables were and thought the waitress wouldn't be able to handle it.

Yang Chow Fried Rice - came with stale ham. First of all, why is ham in there? Second, well - it was stale… gone bad… made the thing taste like crap. Sent it back; asked for it without the pork. They brought it back and said they remade it with fresh ham. It was edible, but not a good example of Yang Chow Fried Rice. They also brought us a pitiful tiny dish (2-in diameter) of dried bean curd and anchovies (a classic Chinese small plate) on the house as an apology - to bad it just made them look stingy and didn't taste good.



Spicy Wontons - the thing I had been craving. It was made improperly. Wontons taste like they were from frozen (which they probably were since they surely did not make them that day) and were a bit mushy. Sauce was really sweet - too much vinegar! Couldn't even taste the spiciness. I ate the two on my spoon and left the rest.

Jiu Cai He (Chives Box) - tasted a little stale and it was dry and tough. Something wasn't right with the filling; might have gone bad. We asked if it was "Fresh" and the waitress responded that of course it was not. Frozen. I have no idea if they prefried it and then froze, then refried, but it sure tasted that way.

Shao Bing with beef - soy sauce boiled beef sandwiched between Chinese flatbread. This was fine. (Except when they brought it out it was shao bing with you tiao (Chinese donuts) which we had to send back telling them they got the order wrong (which is ridiculous since we marked the line item on a piece of paper they provide).

Beef Chow Fun - something was seriously wrong with the chow fun. It was mushy and sandy/grainy (but soft sand/grains). The dish overall was both overly salty and not flavorful. Beef was overly corn starched. Tina and I decided at this point to just "muscle" our way through the meal and leave since with so many dishes bad there's no point sending them back - the meal was over. However, my mom started up with the waitress and asked what was wrong with the chow fun saying it wasn't fresh. The waitress said they make it in house. My mom said it tasted like it had been "washed" (this is all in Chinese). They took the chow fun and chives boxes away to take to the kitchen to examine at this point.

Upon return, another woman came and said the rice noodles had been overly soaked and they couldn't make the dish without it being the same, so they'd take it off the bill.

Sweet soy bean milk - best thing there. I bet it came from a bottle and was heated.

Shang jian bao - dry; heavy pork flavor in filling (not in a good way… like not good pork flavor)

Smoked fish - it was fine. Sweet and flakey. We guessed it also came prepackaged.

Drunken Chicken - winey, but it doesn't seem like they used the right wine. Chicken flesh was also not firm - a bit loose and soft. Passable.

Wonton soup - Fine for frozen wontons in a light broth. I wouldn't expect more out of this.

Best quote during the meal was from Tina was whispered to me: "I don't even care about the food tasting bad or whatever; I just want to leave here without having diarrhea."